This was another sign spotted in Stavanger. Okay, it’s a tattoo studio and they’re supposed to have an attitude. But would you really like to come back to the shop after you’d seen this sign?

On another note, the sign is really well designed to match in with the metal door. I just wish they’d kept the font the same as the name of the studio.

Oh my. Oh dear. A recent trip to Stavanger revealed Norway’s next generation of zebra crossing men. How terrible.

The Norwegian zebra crossing sign is one of my favourites. The guy is just funky. There’s something about his tipped trilby hat, his fitted jacket and purposeful stride that makes me think he’s crossing the road for a mighty fine reason - perhaps he’s off to a jazz club, or to a tango dance. Whatever it is, I’d like to join him.

But some people have no respect. Here he is with a TV on his head. I’m not sure why he has the TV on his head, but it certainly ruins his generally cool funk.

And here he is, striding over the zebra crossing outside my house. He’s been graffited like this for some months. Last week, five men spent four days digging up the pavement. The Crossing Man spent most of those lying on the mud and tarmac, still striding, but going nowhere. Then after four days of hard word and loud noise, they put Crossing Man back up. Oddly, the workers didn’t remove graffiti.

Spotted in Oxford, this is a classic example of someone trying to sound important and official - and ending up sounding like Yoda. Surely, instead of using the rather odd ‘cross the red light’, it would have simpler - and easier to understand - if they’d written the more common ‘drive through the red light’.

And then we have ‘Damage to your vehicle may result’. Why turn it around?

I saw this sign outside the Gellert Baths in Budapest. (Sorry about the quality of the photo, it was a quick snapshot on my phone in dim light.) Basically it’s reminding people that they can get an aroma therapy massage at the baths. And it finishes with the line:

“We wish you a pleasant relaxation to the fundamentally refreshing service of Swedish.”

Huh?

They say that Norway only has two seasons: a white winter and a green winter. Which makes this sign inside Vestfold University College or the more useful. The bus stop is three minutes walk from the school and the wooden shelter doesn’t offer much protection from freezing cold, driving rain or heavy snow. So knowing exactly when the next bus is coming is essential if you don’t want to suffer frost bite.

The concept is so simple, I wonder why they don’t do it in more places. An info screen lets people in the school know when the next 12 buses are coming, saving them from rushing for a bus they’ve already missed or waiting twenty minutes in the cold for a bus to come. The technology isn’t dreadfully advanced - as far as I can tell the info screen just lists the timetable. So the next step would be to link it to the actual buses, so you would know if a bus is late or has already left one minute before schedule.

But this will do for the time being.

And by the way, the tagline for the High School is quite neat. It says “Use your head. Follow your heart”.

The idea for serioussignage came to me on a trip back to the UK this summer. Living abroad for the last eleven years, I’d assumed that bad signage was usually down to poor translations. And then, looking closely at signs in the UK, I realised that people put up bad signs all the time - even in their native tongue. And the cause wasn’t always the text. Here’s an example of a perfectly well-written sign that is completely ruined by placement.

Hung as part of an exhibition into the life of Diana Princess of Wales, this sign is intended to draw attention to her work to help people suffering from leprosy. But the first line of the quotation spreads a full two metres, and the second line is very short. This is bad design, but not a terrible sign. Until that is, someone decided to train a spotlight on the first line, cutting it in two. The result is not what was originally intended. It reads:

“The worst part of leprosy is the stigma it brings. [Spotlight]
For that we will be forever grateful.”

In order to inaugurate my posting on this illustrious blog, I humbly submit a ‘please do not park in front of my car’ sign from a suburb of greater Tokyo. This may also be considering as a submission within the ‘Nice To Know’ category. I am afraid there will be a few post from my recent (and first) foray east of the EC. The rough translation was provided by a japanese friend of mine, but as a ‘graphic proffessional’ (be that as it may) I was much more influenced by the portrayal of exactly how upset the owner of the active driveway would be should they be impeded in some form prior to a quick getaway.

This sign was spotted in a National Trust country house in the UK. I really like it, despite the bizarre use of the -ing form. It’s polite and to the point - and it tells me why I should close the gate, which is something I appreciate in a sign.